Spending July 4 in Palos Verdes 

For July 4, we got to throw our own little bbq at a house worthy of an Architectual Digest visit.  We were able to use this $10 million dollar home for free because my friend knows the owners, who happened to be out of town that weekend.  The owner of the home is arguably the #1 advertising director in the world.  All those Apple ads you see?  That's just one of his clients.  He's even won an Emmy for his commercials. 

The dual staircase entrance way.  The view from above the staircase.  Looking straight out, you see a koi pond, then the pool, then the ocean.  Very linear and pleasing. 

I was very impressed with the house because the owner had the vision for the basic design of the house and also picked out all the interior details, like flooring, lighting, etc.   It was a modern, southwestern type villa.  The theming was consistent through out. 

I loved the master bedroom.  Very clean and open, there's the bed, sitting area, and a balcony that overlooks the ocean.  

There were many other rooms to the house, including a pool table/game room, extra bedrooms, a mini home theater, an expansive kitchen, family room, and living room with piano.  The house was big, but didn't feel gigantic.  

Exit their backyard and you exit directly to the beach.  It was their house, the cliff, and the beach.  No houses or streets inbetween.  Each property is reponsible for creating and maintaing their own walkway down to the beach.  The city does not build steps or pave concrete ramps to get you down there. 

Same view from the backyard table (pictured above), just facing the other way during sunset. 

About 25 of us went.  Here's Tiff, Ryan, Diana, Jackie, and Sharon. 

The only bad thing is that we didn't get to see any fireworks.  Rockets don't reach that side of the water.  Gotta sacrifice somewhere, right? 

How Many People Have You Been With?  

My guy friends ask me.  My long time female friends ask me.  People I date ask me.  I want to know.  You want to know.  We all want to know. 

In fact it is no one's business.  Because we are so damn curious, most of us dare not ask it in person, but we ask it in our heads.  But why?  Is this so that we can compare ourselves to others and know that we are normal?  I've only been with two long term, and she's only been with two long term, so we are equal.  Or I've had five flings and she's had ten, that makes her more dangerous?  More slutty?  Or 10-5 my way.  I'm a man whore.  The combinations are endless. 

There's no good answer.  Every answer is lose lose.  Been with nobody?  Too few, I don't want to deal with all the emotional hang ups of breaking you in.  You might be a cold fish.  Been with 5, 10, 15, 20+?  That's too many.  And who are all these women?  Did you like them?  Did you love them?  Do you still talk to them?  Did you say the same things to her that you're telling me?  What makes me special?  Are you clean?  When was your last test?  Are you going to leave me for one of them if I'm not that good? 

Even an ideal answer, like, "The only people I've been with are the two people that I've been in serious long term relationships with."  Congratulations, you can commit and you're monogamous.  But still she'll wonder, were your exes better?  In what way?  Or if she's wonderful, you have to ask... where did she learn that trick?

This is not an argument for or against virginity.  I'm Christian and I believe that these questions won't get asked if you're both virgins, which is a good thing.  But that opens you up to a whole new bag of questions.  The ones you ask after you have sex for the first time.  Hopefully all you'd have to say is, "Why is it so good and why have I been holding out?"  But more likely,  "Is this it?  She's a cold fish and am I really stuck with this boring girl for life?"  Those kinds of questions.  

I haven't polled my boys, but I'd guess girls are more likely to ask this question.  Even if she's been with 50 guys, she still wants to know how many you've been with.  Really?  Why does it matter?  If you love me, you love me, right?  If you don't love me and we both just want to get it on, it doesn't mean anything anyways, right? 

She's hot and she's been with 10 men.  She's ugly and she's been with 10 men.  She's hot and she's been with only 1 man (ideal answer).  She's ugly and she's been with zero men.  Any answer will have me second guessing in different ways.  If you ask someone the question, you better be prepared to answer it yourself.   

You're on a date (whether with your new steady or just someone hot as hell).  Things get touchy feely.  Then he/she bites you on the lip and says, "Before we go any further, how many people have you been with?  When's the last time you did, you know...."

1. Do you answer the question or do you change the topic? 
2. If you've dodged the question before, what did you say?
3. If the person refuses to answer the question, do you hold that against them?  Even if you know they are committed to you and only you? 
4. What's an ideal number?  Is there even an ideal number or reasonable number?
5. Would you prefer your sig other to be virgin, semi-experienced (1-3 serious relationships), or very experienced (where you don't want to know the numbers, all you know is that he/she makes you feel great)? 

Just Minding My Own Business

Friday night I was set for a night of laundry and ironing.  Then Cousin Dede (verified xangan name: deshue) called, said she won some tickets to see the Michael Jackson Tribute/Cover Band - Who's Bad.  She went w/ her BF and left the last two tickets for me.  I couldn't find any friends free on last minute's notice so I went myself. 

Who's Bad is funktastic R&B pop goodness.  They are recognized as the "pre-eminent" MJ cover band.  If you're looking for Michael Jackson perfection, you won't find it.  But if you're looking for a good time, it's a fun show that takes you through many of Michael's hits.   Joseph Bell, the lead Michael has a lot of Michael's moves down pat.  That doesn't mean he doesn't miss, because he does.  There are some awkward transitions between moves that appear all too often.  What that showed to me is not that Who's Bad sucked, but that the real Michael's moves, transitions, and showmanship are so next level that it's impossible to replicate him.   Everyone had a great time, if you go next time, you will too. 

For awhile near the end I got separated from my cousin.  Too my left were two girls and to my right were for girls.  I was wedged in.  The girls on the right asked me to take a picture for them on their camera.  The last couple of songs came on and one of the pumas (not cougars, I said pumas), grabbed my hand and made me dance with her.  She was really cute, the hottest one of the group (just my luck!).  Then I took some more pictures for them and then we all took one together, then she asked for my number so that she could facebook me.   Surprisingly, this type of random, weird stuff happens to me once a year and only once a year (if you've been following my blog, you know exactly what I mean), which means I have nothing exciting to look forward to for the rest of the year (and we are only in August, darn!). 

I know, I'd think I was making this stuff up too, but six feet away, Dede was a witness, laughing her head off when she saw the girl grab me.  So... which girl was it?  Take a guess.  Puma, not cougar okay?  Stupid concert, now I'm out of clothes to wear!   Why didn't I stick to just doing laundry?   =) 

p.s.  Thanks for the ticket hookups Dede! 

Reality Check On the Way Back From Lunch

I was driving back to work on Main St. in Santa Ana yesterday and the traffic slowed.  A jaywalker had been hit. 

The police were there, but the paramedics hadn't arrived yet (they got there as soon as I passed).  No one was talking to her and she wasn't moving.  It looks like there was a small pool of blood that dripped across two lanes.  I don't know what happened to her.  I hope she's alright. 

***Update***

Just found this... not good news.  She did not survive. 

http://www.ocregister.com/articles/santa-woman-vehicle-2522371-fled-scene. 

I feel my most manly when I can name the classical song that's playing on the radio.  I was driving back on lunch break and yelled, "Beethoven's 7th!  Beethoven's 7th!"  Song ends.  Announcer says I'm right. 

Tell me one more time girls, you've read "Eat, Pray, Love" and "The Alchemist?"  If there's one thing that pops more than anything else on womens' online dating profiles, it's this.  Maybe that was the last thing you read, but do you think men care?   It's like me saying that I love watching MMA and playing video games.  Is that really a turn on to the opposite sex? 

Guys Stalk, Girls Smother

I was supposed to go on an online date with this girl and we set up date, but it's a week later.  For someone I don't know, that's a lot of dead air time.  When you've already established you're curious enough to meet someone, how much more can you talk about before the day without taking out all the mystery?   That's the dilemma I was in.  It's not that I don't want to talk to the girl, it's that I want to know that I'm attracted to the person (in person) before I overinvest words.   I sound like a snob. 

In the week leading up to the date, I get three short emails (two or three lines) a day from this person.  It's sort of cute, but something feels off and I can't put a finger on it.  This is a person that hasn't revealed their full name to me, wanted my phone number so that they could call me (they did), but then wouldn't give out their number in return (restricted cell line).  I understand a girl needing to protect herself, but it feels very untrusting to not give out at least one of the above (real name or phone number).  Anyhow, no biggie. 

You know me, I started thinking.  What if I was emailing some online girl that I never met before three times a day?  What if I called her a few times, but wouldn't give out my number, only talking to her during my convenient times?  What if I gave out a very ambiguous first name?  It would be creepy.  I would seem stalker, two timing, or desperate.  But if a girl is doing it, does that mean it's okay, that it feels like she's into you?  No, not really.  It feels smothering.  It gives off the sense that she's needy and I don't do well with overly dependent, overly needy girls.  If she's checking in with me ever two or three hours already, if we start dating, is she gonna be calling me every hour on the hour?   

Girl, as charming as you are, I'm a guy.  I need to see who you are first before I can get that excited.  Yes, I'm shallow like that.  If you're picture isn't that clear (it wasn't), then I'm guarded, because you might be that tranny I always nightmared about.  Or you might look 10 years older and 20 lbs fatter than your picture.  As much as you want to, resist messaging me every couple of hours.   It scares me.

1. Girls... What subtle things tip you off that your date might be potential creep or stalker? 
2. Guys... What's your way of telling if a girl you don't yet know will be overly needy, demanding, or possessive?

The Celebrity Paparazzo 

While at the Michael Jackson Memorial (I know it seems like ages ago), I bumped into a guy that looked familiar. 

• Me:  Hey... You're the paparrazi guy!  
• Paparrazo:  Yeah, that's me.
• Me:  I met you about six months ago, at a Paris Hilton event, when she was at Foxtail Lounge. 
• Paparrazo:  Oh yeah, I remember you!  What agency are you with? 
• Me:  Ha ha, no, I just do this for fun.  I don't work for anyone.  Where's your camera? 
• Paparrazo:  Can you believe it?  We (pointing to his friend) won tickets.  I can't believe it, we are just following the MJ vibe.  There's an energy flow going on.  I am actually friends with Michael, I've done photo shoots for him before.  We just got back from Neverland.  Have you ever thought how you or I got these tickets?  Of all the people in the world, why us?  It's karma, I'm tellin' you, do you feel the energy spirit too? 
• Me:  Yeah, I thought about it and wondered how the heck I got the tickets, because I really wanted to go, but maybe it was fate.  So, who do you work for?  No camera today?
• Paparrazo:  HollywoodTV.com.  I have the camera in the car, but I'm not working today.  Even if I was, I wouldn't know where to position myself.  What entrance is the casket coming out, where are the stars entering, the security, this would be a tough one.  But I'm glad I'm here, I'm a huge fan. 
• Me:  Yeah, totally.  I'm Howard.  What was your name? 
• Paparrazo:  Hey, I'm Rick.  Rick Mendoza.  Good seeing you again!

I had wondered before why in the world I was blessed with tickets.  Was it because AEG was sponsoring the event and I have Lakers season tickets, and the Lakers play at Staples?  How did MJ know that I wanted to say goodbye?  Even before he said it, a part of me wondered if it was karma or divine intervention.  Me, a ticket seller, getting the holy grail of tickets. 

Anyhow, life is always interesting when you meet different people.  I looked him up on the net.  If you're ever at a hot club, or walking down Robertson Blvd, or outside of trendy restaurant in WeHo and you see this guy with the hat, now you know who he is (on the left).

What's the big deal?  He's infamous!  Remember when psycho baldheaded Britney Spears ran over someone a couple of years ago?  He was the one that got his foot crushed by tires.  He was filming during the whole fall and other paparrazi caught the whole incident on tape too.  He's also filed a $2 million dollar civil suit against her.  Do you remember seeing the video? 

LA Being LA, what story can top that of A-List celebrities?  Ironically, that might be the story of a celebrity paparazzo.  Man, this world is small. 

I was having lunch outside at Felix Continental Cafe in the Orange Circle yesterday.  I'm chowing down on my roasted pork with garlic butter sandwich and fries.  Two guys are eating at the table next to me. 

• Dude #1:  I got this (the check).
• Dude #2:  This means I have to take you out next time!
• Dude #1:  Take me out, take me in...
• Dude #2:  Take you anytime, any way...

The pig tries to jump out of my stomach.  Garlic butter is spewing out the nose.  Ughhhh...

This past weekend, my high school friend, who was visiting from Baltimore, threw a house party to introduce her baby to everyone.  I want to see the boy, so my friend takes me to him.  His two grandmas are holding him.  I get introduced to her son and the grandmas.  He's a heavy booger, even at only three months of age, he's all meat, packing potatoes.  The grandmas ask her if I speak Cantonese, she tells them I speak Mandarin. 

• Grandmas (all Grandma conversation is in Cantonese):  Does he have children? 
• My Friend:  No.
• Me (to my friend):  No kids that I know of!
• My Friend:  Ha ha ha... I better not translate that to them. 
• Grandmas:  Is he married? 
• My Friend:  No.
• Grandmas:  Does he have a girlfriend? 
• My Friend:  No.
• Grandmas:  He needs to hurry up and find a lang noie!
• Me (laughing):  Hey, I understood that! 

I just got grilled by some grandmas!  I'm so glad that my parents and immediate family aren't that goal oriented.  I always cringe when I hear parents pressuring my friends to hurry up and find someone or to hurry up and get married or to hurry up and bear them a son.   

Do your parents or other family members pressure you like that (BF/GF, marriage, bear children)?  How do you respond? 

The Michael Jackson Memorial (July 7, 2009) - Exclusive Xanga Coverage 

By now you're sick of the coverage, but hey, you know you want to hear it from a Xangan's perspective!  I don't know how I won tickets, but I did.  Last week I asked for the day off, this was before they even announced what the event would be or how the tickets would be distributed.  Then they announced the lottery system and my heart was crushed.  I registered, but didn't expect to win.  I was just hoping that maybe a friend a would win and that I could pay them good money (up to $500) to go with them.  In my heart, I knew I would find a way in.  When I found out I won, I screamed out loud and started hyperventilating. 

I'll try and avoid overtalking about the event itself since you've all seen the highlights.  Hopefully these pictures will give you a better view of the scene and vibe of the day. 

Flower Street perimeter.  Streets were blocked off so you needed tickets and wristbands just to get past that barrier.  Media trucks took up all the parking lots immediately surrounding Staples Center. 

As I approached Staples Center, there was a second wristband checkpoint.  This was to separate Staples Center attendees from Nokia Theatre attendees from media.  Michael Jackson slideshows were being projected on the screens at LA Live. 

This is one of the many Michael Jackson signature walls.  There were about six or seven of these.  I didn't sign it... would the family really read and save these?  Ever wonder what happens to these signature banners after you sign them?

11th Street was sliced right down the middle.  Media fenced off on one side, us attendees on the other. 

The plaza at LA Live was MC Escher like.  Did you know 2500 press passes were issued for this event?  The major studios and stations weren't in the front, they were tiered up, about five levels worth.  This gave them an elevated camera angle to film the scene.  See how the fence barricades go up?  Normally this plaza is just flat all the way back.  Some of the VIPs also went over and gave interviews in that area. 

We went back out to the perimeter and did another round.  A stop at Starbucks showed my $1.4 million taxpayer dollars at work.

Fifi LaRue, 45 years old,  kept on proclaiming himself the King of Goth.  What a joke and attention whore. 

My brother met Michael Jackson. 

Hottie Michael.

Lucha Libre Michael.  My brother couldn't believe that I approached him, but I remembered those t-shirts from the 80s... No Fear.  The gross thing is that this a bearded man holding a Sephora bag.  I shouldn't be laughing, I went home, looked on Reuters.com and he was interviewed for their day's footage. 

That jacket is dope!

Two cuties, posing in matching outfits and fedoras.

Chris Escobar, age 13, doing his Moonwalk for us (he was featured on Steve Lopez's LA Times column).

I talked to the Mexican guy who brought in this flower display.  It took him four days to make this and he also made a smaller one that was displayed at the Forest Lawn site.  He wasn't some GQ/high end flower guy, he looked just like a typical gardener. 

When I left the program, I noticed this was added...

Frickin' Ed Hardy/Christian Audigier had to advertise himself on a day like this.  Can't you just send a gift without taking credit?  I know he's t-shirt guy for the stars, but let's say it together, "Tacky!"

My seats were on the first level, behind all the floor seats.  It was slightly obstructed due the AV/soundsystem guys and the elevated TV cameras.  I didn't have a good view of the speakers podium, but could see them on the big screen. 

The floor section was all VIPs.  Do you see the empty section on the right?  Actually there are three on the lower level that are sort of empty.  The three prime, side sections on each side of the building were also reservered for family and friends.  If you think about it that way, half of the lower level seats weren't available to the public.  I consider myself very lucky to have had a 100 level seat.  At the bottom right corner of the first picture is one of the VIP entrance tunnels. 

I tried to get pictures of the people entering, but with or without flash, it was just too dark inside.  See all those guys in suits?  There were about 15-20 of them.  That's Louis Farrakhan and the NOI (Nation of Islam).  Farrakhan is in the grey suit with the black handkerchief.  The NOI is pretty ridiculous sometimes.  Halfway through the service Farrakhan had to take a piss.  10 guys followed him to the bathroom. 

Kobe & Magic.

Jennifer Hudson.

I loved the testimonies by Brooke Shields, Jermaine Jackson, and Marlon Jackson.  They reminded us that Michael was human, a normal person trying to live a normal life in a world that forced him to live an abnormal life. 

The ghost of Michael appears. 

At the beginning of the memorial event, I mentioned to my brother that if someone in the audience started singing "We Are the World," I bet the whole crowd would join in in tears.  Well, the song was sung by the whole crew near the end of the event, but didn't really have the effect that I thought it would.  I still think that if someone in the audience started it (vs. it being done on stage) would have been the biggest bonding thing ever. 

The mood in the building was respectful and somber, but you could sense the appreciation that everyone had for Michael's existence.  When there were pauses in the program, every so often someone would yell out, "We love you Michael!"  If someone shouted something stupid, then people around that person would tell them to shut up.  I was pretty saddened by the Brook, Jermaine, and Marlon testimonies, but Paris Michael Jackson's  line was the knockout blow.  You could feel it in the whole building, everyone just got punched in the gonads.  Janet  Jackson was actually going to say something, but then Paris cut in and after that Janet and LaToya walked with Paris off the stage to the side. 

Staples Center, right after the memorial ended. 

About the VIPs and celebrities, there were a lot of people there that you probably didn't read about.  Because there was no formal carpet event and the guests weren't made available to the public, the press didn't notice/identify a lot of the people present.   On top of the people on stage, also present were...

• Spike Lee
• Louis Farrakhan
• Jesse Jackson
• P Diddy
• Don King
• Larry King
• Mike Tyson
• All of MLK's kids, including Dexter, the one who is in dispute with his brother and sister over their father's rights
• Some of the Wayans family, including Kim
• Robert Townsend
• Todd Bridges
• Elizabeth Berkley
• Verne Troyer
• Earth, Wind, and Fire
• Omarion
• Lil' Kim
• Chris Brown
• Nicky Hilton 
• Tatum O'Neal
• Kim Kardashian and her mother and sisters
• Dionne Warwick
• Chris Tucker
• Anderson Cooper
• Mickey Rooney
• Lou Ferrigno
• Tyler Perry
• Barbara Walters
• Corey Feldman

Noticeably absent were Whitney Houston (who requested a ticket, but then didn't attend when her request to sing was declined), Justin Timberlake (who was asked by Jermaine to perform, but elected to honor Michael in private), Diana Ross and Elizabeth Taylor, both of whom elected to honor Michael in private.  Then there's Prince, the artist formerly known as, who probably didn't attend because Michael was his main rival in the 1980s.  The feelings probably hold until this day, where Prince saw himself as making "real" music while Michael was garnering more attention doing the pop thing.  Madonna probably wasn't in town, and former Indiana Pacers star Reggie Miller, a huge, huge MJ fan (his teammates tracked down a signed Michael Jackson fedora as his retirement gift), said he was invited to the event by Jermaine but declined because he didn't want the event or anything else to taint his memories of Michael. 

I gotta thank the two brothas behind me, they helped me spot a lot of the celebs that entered in front of our section.  I didn't see everyone on the list, but I did see Jesse Jackson, Louis Farrakhan, the MLK kids, Kobe Bryant (huge applause), Magic Johnson (huge applause), Larry King, Elizabeth Berkley, the Wayans, Omarion, Robert Townsend, Verne Troyer, Earth, Wind, and Fire, and Kim Kardashian and her mom enter. 

When we exited the arena, someone was trying to skywrite a love MJ thing.  I can't make it out.  Looks like he messed up the first try? 

We took our time exiting and there were still mobs of local, national, and international media trying to get their interviews.  We loved the teddy bear shaped Japanese fan's shiny rainbowmirrortastic shirt "Michael Jackson Lives In Me."  He was so fobalicious.  By the way, that gold program that he's holding (that all attendees received) is selling for about $500 on eBay.

Making our way to the perimeter.  I should've taken a picture of the guy selling Michael Jackson "King of Pop" soda.  It looked like he had steamed off the labels on root beer bottles and plastered on some cheap, black and white computer printed sticky labels on the side.  It was so cheesy that I thought it unpicture worthy, then I hear all the media talking about it on the news.   I also should've captured the spirit of the street vendors, all of them selling unlicensed goods, as there were no items for sale at the event (Classy move on the part of AEG and the family.  We all wanted to buy shirts and programs, but it would've looked cheap selling things on such a day.). 

We got stopped by the Chinese channel, Channel 18, KSCI-TV.  The first thing she said to me was, "Do you speak Mandarin?"

I did my interview in Mandarin.  It was really sad, my vocabulary level is like that of a five year old's.  She pointed the mic at my brother and he said, "No thanks, I can't do it in Mandarin."  She said English was okay.  I asked her what time it would be on if we made the cut.  6 p.m.  I got home and hoped for the best. 

Oh yeah!  We made it.  I facebook updated in time for some of my friends to catch me on air too. Later that night another friend sends me this...

"Hey!  I just saw you on Nightline!" 

Then throughout the week, friends were telling me how they saw me on ABC Channel 7 in the morning and others saw me on Nightline.  I guess they used the footage of me in the day again for the Nightline feature story.  Awesome!   Unfortunately, I can't order the Nightline footage from ABC.  According to their agreement with AEG, all media outlets were only allowed to broadcast Michael Jackson Memorial footage for the first 24 hours. 

All in all, it was an unbelievable day.  I would've preferred not to have been there, because like Stevie Wonder, I never wanted to see this day come, but I feel blessed that I got to attend such a special event.  I think the memorial went as well as it possibly could've gone (minus Sheila Jackson).  It was a perfect mix of church service, Michael's music, church music (Lionel Richie ripped it up gospel style), serious testimonies (Paris, Jermaine, Marlon, and Brooke Shields), fun testimonies (Magic Johnson, Smokey Robinson), Baptist message (fiery Al Sharpton), and Michael's humanitarian impact.  It was as commercial as an event could be, but it didn't feel commercial at all.  It was somber, reflective, celebratory, and intimate.  It felt like I was somewhere where I shouldn't have been.  It felt like I was family.   

Michael Jackson Appearing To Me

When I opened the email, I kept on expecting the image to just fade away, or that the computer monitor would blow up and validate the dream.  No such thing happened.  Congratulations!

It feels weird knowing I "won" the lottery.  Last night I couldn't sleep, even though my body begged for the rest.  I was restless, like when I was a kid and mom told me the next day we'd be going to Disneyland.  I could never sleep well those nights. 

It feels weird knowing that I'll just be in the vicinity of Staples Center.  Whether the tickets were for overflow Nokia Theatre or if they were for Staples, I wouldn't care either way, though I'm thinking, it really would be awesome to be in Staples Center.  

It feels weird knowing that I'll be in Staples Center.  It feels even weirder knowing that I have a first level seat.  Section 106.  Directly facing the stage, from the back end of the first level.  Did everyone before me get lower level seats too, or did some people get upper level seats?   If all the VIPs are on the floor, are some of them also on the first level?  How did I luck into 100 level seats? 

It feels weird that I'm so excited that I want to scream to the world, but at the same time, I think that some people might be hating on me out of envy.  I know, it just happens.  It's like I want to share the good news, but I don't. 

It feels weird to be so excited, because when I think past the excitement, I'm really, really sad.  This is not a joyous occasion.  It's a celebration of one man's life, but it's tinged w/ tragedy, hurt, pain, and numbing pain.  He brought so much joy to everyone his first 35 years of life, and in his last 15 years he was recluse, eccentric, and lived out.  His face a shell of what it was, a body of sticks. 

I can't even pinpoint why I feel so strongly about Michael Jackson.  Is it because everyday, when I came home from elementary school, I'd watch 30-60 minutes of MTV and Billie Jean and Beat It would always be on?  Is it because the world premeire of the Thriller video is one of the few things that stands out from my childhood?  Is it because my brother, as a toddler, would do Michael Jackson dance moves?  We Are the World?  Why is it that for the past ten years, everytime I see an excellent condition copy of the Thriller LP at the Goodwill, I buy it, even though I already have a copy? 

Is there any celebrity in my life that is/was/will be as defining?  As known?  Is there any person that even comes close?  JFK was light years before my time but he's only famous in the US.  Elvis and John Lennon were around for a bit but my preschool teachers didn't cover it in their news items for the week.  The only one that comes to mind is Princess Diana.  Beloved around the world, her funeral was a royal procession for the city and world to see.  Who is bigger, MJ or Lady Di?  My gut feeling says MJ.  Music is more accessible.  Music celebrates with you when you're happy, cries with you when you've lost your true love, helps you onto your next love and in rare instances, even helps to unite the world.   

They are calling it the "golden ticket."  The most coveted ticket in world history?  I can't tell you what it feels like.  If numb is a feeling, then that's what I feel like.  It feels exaggerated.  Even I can't comprehend the magnitude.  The whole world will be watching this?  Everyone behind their TVs, me being a lucky one, having the privilege to say goodbye in public, with 18,000 other fans, friends, and mourners. 

I'm excited for tomorrow, but when I get there, at some point, I'm going to be overwhelmed with emotion.  Maybe Stevie Wonder will be speaking, or maybe Smokey Robinson will be singing, or maybe John Mayer will play that Eddie Van Halen riff, or maybe Usher will be dancing, or maybe Janet Jackson will tell a story about their childhood.  At some point my eyes will not hold back and the water will flow.  I will wipe it with a hard brown Staples Center napkin.  I still won't be able to tell you why I'm crying, other than that I'm sad. 

DjCaptainZowie wishes he didn't have to attend this event but will try and document the occasion for you in his next post.  Stay tuned. 

My body is seriously going numb right now and I was hyperventilating because I just won...  

MICHAEL JACKSON MEMORIAL TICKETS!!! 

And no, I am not joking. 

I don't even know what I should wear.  Do I dress up in a suit?  Do I go casual?   I feels like it should be a formal event.  My head is still spinning.